9 个让你的人生变得更富足的生活系统 | Beads #68

And the idea is that life over time becomes more and more chaotic and you're not able to do that. And so having like a true line in the sand that you're gonna do this at least once a month is a good way to just make sure that it's happening and continue to progress your relationship.

这个做法的初衷是，因为随着时间的推移，生活会变得越来越混乱，你会变得无法做到这个事情。所以每个月至少做一次这样的事情是一个很好的方法，来确保它的发生，并且继续推进你们的关系。

The system does not reduce spontaneity and creativity. It actually increases it because it means you now don't have to think about that.

系统不会减少自发性和创造性，反而能增加它们，因为它意味着你现在不必考虑这个问题了。

So with parents, I think it's really important to realize they're just not gonna be around forever. With friends, I think it's a little bit of a different story because you have seasons to your life. There's not one act to your life play where you're the same person for the entirety of your life, nor are your friends the same person over the entirety of their lives. And so there are some friends who are great fit for one season of your life and aren't gonna be there in the next one. And that's okay. You don't have to keep trying to jam them in there...... I think continuing to try to live with and be around people that aren't actually a match and that aren't developing you and you aren't developing them is actually a bad thing. And so being aware that it's okay to leave things behind to like shed your old shell and move on to the new one like a, you know, hermit crab does over the course of its life is totally a positive thing in certain cases.

关于父母的话，你要意识的的一个重要事实就是，他们不会永远活着。但关于朋友，我认为有些不同，因为你的生活有不同章节。在你的人生剧本中，你不可能是一个一直不变的人，你的朋友也不是一辈子都是同一个人。所以有些朋友非常适合你其中的某个章节，但下一个章节就不在了，但没关系，你不必一直试图把他们塞进每个章节...... 我认为继续尝试与不匹配的人生活在一起，他们没有帮助你进步，你也没有帮助他们进步，这实际上是一件坏事。因此，意识到可以把某些事情放下，就像寄居蟹一样脱掉旧壳换上新壳，在某些情况下是一件积极的事情。

And the most powerful thing I've ever read on this is like you should default to empathy when you see someone react that way because there's something going on in their life.

我读过的最有力量的一个观点是，当你看到别人有这样的反应时，你可以默认自己去同情 Ta ，因为 Ta 的生活中肯定发生了些什么。

I think that in order to live a truly happy and fulfilled existence, we need to expand what is on our scoreboard, and we need to think about these other areas of life. We need to think about our physical health and vitality. We need to think about our mental health, mental fitness, mental vitality. We need to think about our social, wealth, cultural or like environments that we're in, you know, the depth of relationships, and we need to think about our time. Most importantly, you need to think about being time wealthy and being able to actually use our time while we can use it.

我认为为了过上真正幸福和满足的生活，我们需要扩大我们的计分板，我们需要考虑生活的其他领域。我们需要考虑我们的身体健康和活力。我们需要考虑我们的心理健康，心理活力。我们需要考虑我们所处的社会，财富，文化或者类似的环境，考虑人际关系的深度，我们需要考虑我们的时间。最重要的是，你需要考虑时间财富，并能够在有时间的时候真正利用好这些时间。

So if you don't do it now, you're not gonna do it. So if you're comfortable with that, then that's fine. You can make that decision. But don't convince yourself that you're not doing it today cuz you'll do it later.

所以如果你现在不做，后面你也就不会做了。如果你能接受的话，那没关系。你可以自己做决定。但不要说服自己，今天不做是因为你以后会做。

Life's never gonna feel easier. There's always gonna be more stuff coming up. And so if it's important, then it should be important now rather than important in the future.

生活永远不会变轻松。总会有更多的事情发生。所以如果某些事很重要，那么它应该现在就很重要，而不是未来很重要。

We're very much blind to our most obvious realities. And when you are on that hustle phase and when you're continuing to progress and doing all those things, you are blind to these obvious realities of the things that you're missing.

我们对最明显的现实视而不见。当你处于那种着急忙慌的阶段，当你一直持续在做这些事情的时候，你会对错过的那些明显的现实视而不见。

A fit body, a calm mind and a house full of love. And that to me is like my guiding light when I think about things like what do I want to achieve? I want to achieve things that have to be earned, that cannot be bought. And that's what I want in life. I wanna go after the things that I have to earn. I just think there's this massive importance of actually going out and earning things, rather than being given to you, or rather than just being able to, you know, buy them and, you know, manifest them to money.

一个健康的身体，一个冷静的头脑和一个充满爱的房子。对我来说，当我思考我想要实现的目标时，这就像是我的指路明灯。我想要那些需要努力争取，轻易买不到的东西。这就是我想要的生活。我想追求那些必须努力获得的东西。我只是觉得真正走出去争取极其重要，而不是仅仅被给予，或者花钱买，又或者把它们直接变成金钱。

It's more about regardless of what happens, I have the skills needed to make money if need be, because I know how to build a business, for example, and that has given me more confidence to be able to adapt to other kind of environments.

更重要的是，不管发生什么，在需要的情况下，我都有赚钱的技能，例如我知道该如何建立一个生意，这给了我更多的信心，能够适应其它类型的环境。

No one has the answers to offer you for your life. There's no one in the world who can say, hey, here are the answers that I can give you. And if you do this, this, this, this, and this, you're gonna be on the path to a successful life. What I can do is help you ask the right questions and give you tools, give you frameworks, give you systems for asking those questions so that you can wrestle with them and figure out what your answers are. Because your answers are gonna be different than mine.

没有人能为你的生活提供答案。世界上没有人能说，嘿，这里有我能给你的答案。如果你这样、这样、再这样，你就会走上成功之路。我能做的就是帮助你提出正确的问题，给你工具，给你框架，给你提出这些问题的系统，这样你就可以努力解决它们，并找出你的答案。因为你的答案会和我的不一样 。

The reality is that as you get older, your energy becomes more and more finite and the whole game becomes figuring out how to deploy that finite energy and create the greatest output, create those non linear outcomes that exist. And getting better and better at that over time is what the real focus should be. It should be figuring out how to deploy that finite energy into the 10 x things into the areas that create the most leverage that you can achieve those non linear outcomes.

事实上，随着年龄的增长，你的能量会变得越来越有限，整个游戏就变成了弄清楚如何分配这些有限的能量，创造最大的输出，创造那些存在的非线性结果。随着时间的推移，越来越善于做这些，才是真正应该关注的。我们应该学习弄清楚如何将有限的能量分配到 10 倍的事物中，以创造最大的影响力，从而实现那些非线性的结果。

When you do that, it's like a little bit of confirmation bias in your life, where your beliefs start creating your reality, your beliefs about yourself as a disciplined person that does the things that you say you're gonna do start getting confirmed by evidence that you're accruing, you create like a little positive momentum of this piece of evidence that you just put on the board that you're doing the things that you say you're gonna do, and that momentum starts bleeding out into everywhere else in your life.

当你这样做时，这就像是你生活中的一点确认偏差，你的信念开始创造你的现实，你对自己作为一个自律的人、做你说你要做的事情的信念开始得到证据的证实，你正在积累，你创造了一点积极的动力，你只是把这个证据公开摆出，表明你正在做你说要做的事情，这种动力开始渗透到你生活的其它地方。

I think doing hard things is important. I mean, you're doing something hard like you're doing something challenging and you're pushing yourself through it. I don't think you would find incredible meaning in a life where you only did things that you were like super excited to do. That's just not. That lacks texture, right? Like that lacks those feelings, the tension, the, like the struggle on a daily basis that actually creates some level of meaning in our lives.

我认为做困难的事情很重要。我是说，你在做一些困难的事情，做一些有挑战性的事情，并推动自己去克服它们。我不认为你只会在让你兴奋的事情中找到重大的意义。事实不是这样的，那样的话会缺乏人生的质感，缺乏那种感觉，缺乏那种张力，而那种每天都在为生活奋斗的感觉，这才为我们的生活创造了某种意义。

And what I have found is that if I optimize for that, having an ideal day, then having another one and just stacking together ideal days, I will progress in the direction that I'm trying to progress in. and it takes so much complexity and noise out of my entire life in system......it removes so much intimidation for me that it's been really empowering.

我发现，如果我对此进行优化，过好理想的一天，再过一个理想的一天，然后不断叠加，我就会朝着我想要进步的方向前进。它剔除了我整个生活系统中的复杂性和噪音……它消除了我太多的恐惧，它真的很有力量。

I mean, we make time for the things we care about and it's never a lack of time, it's always a lack of priorities. And so if something really matters to you, you'll make time in the calendar for it.

我的意思是，我们会为自己关心的事情腾出时间，缺少的从来都不是时间，而是优先级。所以如果有什么事情对你来说真的很重要，你总会在日程上为它腾出时间。